Like buttah
Aug. 2nd, 2004 11:35 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
malsperanzaA well-crafted simile is a pleasing thing, and not at all easy to write. The presence of the word "like" is an almost sure-fire recipe for cliche.
Her eyes were like twin pools of midnight.
Feh.
Instinctively, we prefer metaphors--they are meatier, more muscular creatures. The fey little simile seems like a weaker thing altogether, more hesitant, more diffident.
But when it works, a good simile is like a sock in the jaw. The best ones have an element of surprise: the thing that is like the other thing is not really like it; the comparison is odd, quirky, unexpected, jarring. And even humorous.
"The friar smiled. It was like a rat diving into a hedge." (Dorothy Dunnett, Race of Scorpions, chapter 2)
"He smiled at her like a light going out." Cassandra Claire, Draco Veritas, chapter 15)
"Like a bird on a wire, like a drunken midnight choir, I have tried in my way to be free." (Leonard Cohen)
"Arkady said nothing. Over the field were the triumphant screams of small birds mobbing a crow; they looked like a bar of music moving through the air." (Martin Cruz Smith, Gorky Park)
By some alchemy of prose, a simile may be transformed into a metaphor:
"As the apple tree among the trees of the wood, so is my beloved among the sons. I sat down under his shadow with great delight, and his fruit was sweet to my taste" (Song of Songs, 2:3)
Or a metaphor into a simile and then back into a metaphor and then back into a simile:
"Weak mortals, chained to the earth, creatures of clay as frail as the foliage of the woods, you unfortunate race, whose life is but darkness, as unreal as a shadow, the illusion of a dream, hearken to us, who are immortal beings, ethereal, ever young and occupied with eternal thoughts.." (Aristophanes, The Birds)
A simile has a punchline:
"As countless swarms of flies buzz around a herdsman's homestead in the time of spring when the pails are drenched with milk, even so did the Achaeans swarm on to the plain to charge the Trojans and destroy them." (Iliad, Bk II)
"But when he raised his voice, and the words came driving from his deep chest like winter snow before the wind, then there was none to touch him, and no man thought further of what he looked like." (Iliad, Bk. III)
It can be extended beyond all reason, and still work (as the Simile Master shows):
"Thus high in hope they sat through the livelong night by the highways of war, and many a watchfire did they kindle. As when the stars shine clear, and the moon is bright--there is not a breath of air, not a peak nor glade nor jutting headland but it stands out in the ineffable radiance that breaks from the serene of heaven; the stars can all of them be told and the heart of the shepherd is glad--even thus shone the watchfires of the Trojans" (Iliad, Bk. VIII)
OK, sometimes a simile can go off the rails:
"Thy teeth are like a flock of sheep that are even shorn, which came up from the washing; whereof every one bear twins, and none is barren among them." (Song of Songs, 4:2)
But sometimes even that works:
"Thy neck is like the tower of David builded for an armoury, whereon there hang a thousand bucklers, all shields of mighty men." (Song of Songs, 4:4)
I really like a good simile.
On a separate subject: Will the LJ community please learn to spell "definitely"? Please?
Her eyes were like twin pools of midnight.
Feh.
Instinctively, we prefer metaphors--they are meatier, more muscular creatures. The fey little simile seems like a weaker thing altogether, more hesitant, more diffident.
But when it works, a good simile is like a sock in the jaw. The best ones have an element of surprise: the thing that is like the other thing is not really like it; the comparison is odd, quirky, unexpected, jarring. And even humorous.
"The friar smiled. It was like a rat diving into a hedge." (Dorothy Dunnett, Race of Scorpions, chapter 2)
"He smiled at her like a light going out." Cassandra Claire, Draco Veritas, chapter 15)
"Like a bird on a wire, like a drunken midnight choir, I have tried in my way to be free." (Leonard Cohen)
"Arkady said nothing. Over the field were the triumphant screams of small birds mobbing a crow; they looked like a bar of music moving through the air." (Martin Cruz Smith, Gorky Park)
By some alchemy of prose, a simile may be transformed into a metaphor:
"As the apple tree among the trees of the wood, so is my beloved among the sons. I sat down under his shadow with great delight, and his fruit was sweet to my taste" (Song of Songs, 2:3)
Or a metaphor into a simile and then back into a metaphor and then back into a simile:
"Weak mortals, chained to the earth, creatures of clay as frail as the foliage of the woods, you unfortunate race, whose life is but darkness, as unreal as a shadow, the illusion of a dream, hearken to us, who are immortal beings, ethereal, ever young and occupied with eternal thoughts.." (Aristophanes, The Birds)
A simile has a punchline:
"As countless swarms of flies buzz around a herdsman's homestead in the time of spring when the pails are drenched with milk, even so did the Achaeans swarm on to the plain to charge the Trojans and destroy them." (Iliad, Bk II)
"But when he raised his voice, and the words came driving from his deep chest like winter snow before the wind, then there was none to touch him, and no man thought further of what he looked like." (Iliad, Bk. III)
It can be extended beyond all reason, and still work (as the Simile Master shows):
"Thus high in hope they sat through the livelong night by the highways of war, and many a watchfire did they kindle. As when the stars shine clear, and the moon is bright--there is not a breath of air, not a peak nor glade nor jutting headland but it stands out in the ineffable radiance that breaks from the serene of heaven; the stars can all of them be told and the heart of the shepherd is glad--even thus shone the watchfires of the Trojans" (Iliad, Bk. VIII)
OK, sometimes a simile can go off the rails:
"Thy teeth are like a flock of sheep that are even shorn, which came up from the washing; whereof every one bear twins, and none is barren among them." (Song of Songs, 4:2)
But sometimes even that works:
"Thy neck is like the tower of David builded for an armoury, whereon there hang a thousand bucklers, all shields of mighty men." (Song of Songs, 4:4)
I really like a good simile.
On a separate subject: Will the LJ community please learn to spell "definitely"? Please?
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
definitlie!
Date: 2004-08-02 09:04 pm (UTC)Aslo, I had to delete one of my doubled announcements off my LJ but I am glad you liked the rewritten 'letter' scene. My appreciation of the gestalt beta is great.
Re: definitlie!
Date: 2004-08-02 11:15 pm (UTC)gestalt beta
Heh.
My pleasure. Didn't feel like I did much, but it was fun. Will send you the other comments one of these days, definately.