malsperanza

vanityfair has posted a veryveryfunny pome here.
I am inspired to imitate.

I'll see your Whitman and raise you a Tennyson:

Half a page, half a page,
Half a page onward,
Into the Chamber of Death
Wrote the sex-hungered.
"Forward, the Slash Brigade!
Charge for the boys!" she said:
Into the Chamber of Death
Wrote the sex-hungered.

"Forward, the Slash Brigade!"
Was there a fan dismayed?
Not tho' the fandom knew
Rowling had blundered:
Theirs was not to disagree,
Theirs was not to squick or squee,
Theirs was but to write H/D:
Deep in the Chamber of Death
Wrote the sex-hungered.

Canon to the right of them,
Canon to the left of them,
Canon in front of them:
Volumes they plunder'd;
Slashed at with ink and pen,
Boldly they wrote and then,
Rewrote it all again,
Wrote the sex-hungered.

Flashed all their boobies bare,
Slashed as they turned in air,
Shocking the readers there,
All the world wonder.
Plunged into ship debates,
Pairing the hottest mates,
Darker and blonder,
Facing the deadly fates,
Hearts ever fonder.
Then they rewrote it all--
Still with the hunger.

Canon to the right of them,
Canon to the left of them,
Canon behind them
Volumes they plunder'd;
Boldly they wrote and yet
Never gave way to het,
Ever the challenge met,
Hearts yearning yonder.

Slashing with taps and clicks,
Caps lock and other tricks,
Rewrote page 806,
Back from the shores of Styx,
Wrote the sex-hungered.

When can their glory fade?
Oh, the wild pairs they made!
Nothing they squandered.

When ye at Nimbus meet
Crashing in someone's suite,
Ctrl alt and then delete,
Let the world ponder:
Honor the slash they made!
Honor the Slash Brigade's
Noble sex-hunger!